Just a little nervousness
Brian:
So this being my first post ever, I'll get right to it. Cassidy and I are working on starting the adoption process. Tomorrow we have our first appointment with The Children's Home Society of Florida. Im excited about what may be in store for us as we see what the possibility of adopting a baby may begin to look like.
Just a little background info. I went to the dr a couple of weeks ago and the he said the chances of us getting pregnant naturally was about the same chance as getting struck by lightning. I don't think I will ever forget that statement. It was sobering to get the news that I could not give my wife the children she wants. Now, there could be something that could be remedied that may change increase the possibility. However, we have always wanted to adopt and provide a loving home to a child that may not otherwise, so we are going to start looking into it.
After receiving the news, I took a trip to Mobile to visit a good friend. Our pastor recommended the book Good Grief and I downloaded it on Itunes for the ride over. I listened to how we can go through several stages of grief even over things like not being able to have biological children. Interestingly enough, our pastor and his wife adopted their children. He said, "You have to grieve the biological children you're not going to have." My original expectation is that I should just be okay with this deal. That I should overlook the pain of not being able to have children. So the drive consisted of me asking, "why" and inviting God to heal me (which He can but still).
Toward the end of the drive, I started to just come to terms with allowing God to take control and let Him be the Provider. As I told God that I want what He wants and that I'd rather His plans be the one we follow and I wasn't going to force things, He showed me a sign of His promise. I made the usual left turn and there in the sky was a rainbow. As if God was saying, "Don't you think I've got you?"
So now, our prayer for the past couple of weeks has been, "Lord, whatever children you choose to bless us with or not, we still will rejoice in You." Our hope is that God will show us the right doors and the courage to open them.
Grace and peace,
Brian
So this being my first post ever, I'll get right to it. Cassidy and I are working on starting the adoption process. Tomorrow we have our first appointment with The Children's Home Society of Florida. Im excited about what may be in store for us as we see what the possibility of adopting a baby may begin to look like.
Just a little background info. I went to the dr a couple of weeks ago and the he said the chances of us getting pregnant naturally was about the same chance as getting struck by lightning. I don't think I will ever forget that statement. It was sobering to get the news that I could not give my wife the children she wants. Now, there could be something that could be remedied that may change increase the possibility. However, we have always wanted to adopt and provide a loving home to a child that may not otherwise, so we are going to start looking into it.
After receiving the news, I took a trip to Mobile to visit a good friend. Our pastor recommended the book Good Grief and I downloaded it on Itunes for the ride over. I listened to how we can go through several stages of grief even over things like not being able to have biological children. Interestingly enough, our pastor and his wife adopted their children. He said, "You have to grieve the biological children you're not going to have." My original expectation is that I should just be okay with this deal. That I should overlook the pain of not being able to have children. So the drive consisted of me asking, "why" and inviting God to heal me (which He can but still).
Toward the end of the drive, I started to just come to terms with allowing God to take control and let Him be the Provider. As I told God that I want what He wants and that I'd rather His plans be the one we follow and I wasn't going to force things, He showed me a sign of His promise. I made the usual left turn and there in the sky was a rainbow. As if God was saying, "Don't you think I've got you?"
So now, our prayer for the past couple of weeks has been, "Lord, whatever children you choose to bless us with or not, we still will rejoice in You." Our hope is that God will show us the right doors and the courage to open them.
Grace and peace,
Brian
Congratulations on starting the adoption process! I thought my plan for having a family was pretty darn good but God had other ideas. Turns out His plan is alwasy best, it just takes some of us longer to figure that out! Looks like you are in a good place. Trusting God is the best place to be. You can grieve the loss of having bio kids and turst God at the same time. Starting the adoption process is a wonderful thing.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the kind words. We are truly blessed to be in a position to be able to offer a child a loving home. We are praying for God to show us the correct path to take. Again, thank you. Blessings!
ReplyDeleteWe are also starting the adoption process. Because we do not have the money that it would take to adopt a baby, we are actually looking into a state adoption. We attended an informational session last month and hope to hear something soon about where we go from here. It's a nerve racking process but the end will be worth it :)
ReplyDeleteHey Kristy. What are some things you found out in the meeting that could be beneficial for us to think about? We'd appreciate any info you found helpful! -Brian
DeleteWell, our meeting was for a state adoption which is rarely going to be for a baby. The children in the state adoption process are children whose parental rights have been stripped permanently and are currently in foster care awaiting a family to adopt them. They use the term "special needs" liberally to define children who have developmental delays OR children who are 8 years old or older. The state adoption involves home visits, physicals, etc. but the cost is much lower because the state pays court costs. Once you have attended the 10 weeks of parenting courses they ask of you (10 3hr classes consecutively) during which time they complete the background checks and home visits. Then you are entered into the process of child selection. You have a few meetings with the child that you select to guage your connection. If you feel that you want to pursue adopting the child, they are placed with you in a 3 month trial period before the adoption proceedings begin. It's still a lengthy process.
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